The Last Post of 2006

As the title suggests this is the last post of 2006, and I thought I'd end the year by putting up some pics of my everyday life...




My Apartment





View from Shonan koko. The photo doesn't do it justice really, as on nice days the Inland Sea sparkles.








Shonan koko

Monday Class with Christmas Cards!








Morning Wednesday Class

Afternoon Wednesday Class- Teaching with my eyes closed (and Futaba-chan spoiling the carefully constructed "teaching" photo)

Wednesday Afternoon Class and Drop-ins during half-time break

Joy as Nishio-san gets his Xmas presents

Merry Christmas Everyone!!! And a Happy New Year!!!

あけまして　おめでとう　ございます (akemashite omedetou gozaimasu)!

The Most Oishii-est Meal I've Had!

This evening I went out for the most delicious ("oishii" in Japanese) meal I've had so far in Japan. It was absolutely amazing, and it has prompted me into what is a long overdue blog entry on Japanese food. I wanted to wait until I knew some of the names of various fishes. However that hasn't happened. So you'll just have to imagine different kinds of very tasty raw fish throughout.

First however I want to record a setback in the efforts to promote Christmas cheer- I mispelled "Christmas" in a lesson. Yes, I know how terrible that is; unforgivable even. And my efforts to cover my mistake with the "well spotted" defence we're half hearted at best, leading to much laughter on the part of my Tuesday morning class. I aim to win them back through a combination of wit and charm (tho obviously not competency in teaching english!).

Anyway, the meal. It was delicious! I went out with a Panama guy called Louis, Mori Yukiko from work, and her friend Kato-san. First we had fish sashimi- raw scallops, a chewy fish and an almost crumbly, melt-in-your-mouth fish thats name begins with "Katsu" I think. That was followed (after a lengthy delay) by teppanyaki, absolutely delicious with squid and octopus, as well as onions, egg, prawns and other stuff. Third course was seafood- raw prawns (I think it was the first time I've had raw prawns), with the most amazing sauce. And crab claws. All this fishyness was rounded off by a platter of sushi- the usual tuna, squid, octopus, eel etc etc, and miso soup. Oishii!!! I was chatting to the guy in the place and told him I'd be back for more. The only problem is its expensive, but everything was caught today apparently. Mmm!

My Last Weekend In Japan...

And so cometh and goeth my last weekend in Japan before holidays.
I spent most of Saturday shopping frantically in Kurashiki and Okayama for last minute things. I managed to visit my favourite spot in Kurashiki, where several dozen large koi (carp) in many crazy colours swin around in a small stream, and where many a time I've sat in a wooden hut and ate my lunch in quiet contemplation. In Okayama I shopped like mad, before getting more points on my Mister Donut Loyalty Card. I raced home, and after dropping stuff off headed to an English teacher's Christmas Party. I thought it was at her house, but it turned out to be in a centre where she teaches English, and I met another gaijin who lives in Kojima! Amazing!! It was a surreal but fun evening, that would have certainly benefitted from some booze (no alcohol at all). I also learnt some filipino for my trip from some ladies who seemed very concerned about our safety in Manila!



On Sunday I met Miwa, Yumiko and Georgina, the previous occupant of my house and previous teacher at Shonan and Seishi. She has come back to teach in Japan again from her home in South Africa. We all went to Nao-Shima, fulfilling a long-held aim of mine to visit the modern art museums and traditional yurts. Actually we didn't visit the yurts in the end, but I wanted an excuse to bring up the emotionally scarring me, Sarah and Lucy felt last year at being deprived our yurt opportunity (by Tim and Emily, no less).

The art museums were expensive but really groit. There was a "Monet room" (note how I've avoided obvious puns involving the name "Monet"), and best of all two "interactive" exhibitions. First we had to walk forward into a UV room down a slope until a buzzer went off, when we had to stop. It was really cool! (my description doesn't do it justice). Secondly, we went to this strange barn where there was no light whatsoever- complete pitch dark, but after sitting in the dark on benches for between 5 and 20 minutes you start to see a UV rectangle in front of you, which glows and turns out to be really bright. Then you walk towards it. It was really funny- much confusion and panicking (mostly by me). Anyway there were lots more exhibits which were really good, and it was easy to get round as we had a car. After we went to a really decent Italian restaurant and then for drinkies in Kursahiki.

Christmas At Shonan

My last two weeks before the Philippines are being spent at Shonan High, and I have been charged with injecting some festive spirit into the school and its students. I am officially "Head of Christmas Cheer" (a self-appointed title I must add). We have two Christmas lessons per class, and are making christmas cards! As ever, each class will begin with an inspirational song, and, it being the season of joy, they will obviously be Christmas Songs. The first choice for Xmas Song was taken out of my hands- John Lennon (it is Japan, after all) and "Happy Christmas" or whatever that dreary song's called. As for the second, I was rooting for what we all know is the best Xmas song ever, Fairytale of New York, but as many native English speakers can't understand Shane MacGowan, its not really fair to inflict him on the Japanese kids. Instead we're going for the bizarrely popular "Last Christmas" by Wham.

Luckily the festive songs aren't just limited to our usual "English song of the week"; while the students scurry around making their cards, we've been playing background Christmas music to fill everyone with love and joy. We've also been learning such classic seasonal phrases as "Happy Holidays", "'Tis The Season", and "Wishing You A Joyous Christmas" (I vetoed "Make It Merry" as a step too far).

Everyone's been enjoying the lessons, and the students have warmed to me and my crazyness, getting used to me wandering into the lessons singing "Silent Night" and other songs in a ridiculous style. I even suggested a musical lesson in which everyone sings instead of speaks, for example "Please can you pass the scissors" to the tune of Come Al Ye Faithful (you probably have to be inside my mind for this to make sense I fear). But alas no, it was vetoed. Strangely, many teachers have been shocked when I've told them I'm not religious. I've been trying to explain that, dispite evident popular belief in Japan, not all Westerners are Christian, and many are just into Christmas for the general spirit of generosity and kindness, like myself. Plus the gifts, food and (most importantly) port, of course.

Finally, I was given a lovely classic children's book "Hyaku man kai ikita neko" (The Cat Who Lived A Million Times) by the kindergarten and its teachers on wednesday, after my last kindergarten lesson of the year. It's so nice! And I can more or less read it. It was signed by the 5 20-year old Japanese teachers and their teacher, Reito-sensei, who is a cool guy with the most excellant turns of phrase in English, and given as a late birthday present, even though I never told them when my bday was! How kind.

More Photos of Me and Orphans

All Alone At Christmas...

My buddy thinks we're playing another game of "Janken" (rock, paper, scissors)

Loony Girl with her Pink Pig

General Merriment

Not Another Piggy-Back!?

Yes, Another Piggy-Back

Me and Rich looking like "dads" in our sweaters. Meanwhile, I steal more of the orphans' food.

Steve-Sensei Saves The Orphans...

...well, that's not entirely true. But I did spend saturday afternoon playing with them, and it was great fun! We went to an orphanage just out to the east of Okayama City, and gave out presents. Then (as shown above), my back was slowly destroyed but a succession of piggy-back rides around the room we were in. At first I happily talked in Japanese, showing off my knowledge of "hikoki" (aeroplane) and "doko e ikimasu ka" (where do you want to go). A long time later, the cries of "achi" (over there) were greeted by stoic expressions of pain and weariness as I ferried orphans to and fro. Despite the early pain it was a great afternoon, which ended in the mass unwrapping of presents- mostly radio-controlled cars, and two radio-controlled helicopters!! There was one girl, (pictured), who got a big pink cuddly pig as her present, and I thought it would be funny if I pretended to try to steal it. She thought it was funny too, but even funnier apparently was then kicking, hitting and biting me, as well as chasing me around the room.

At 4pm the fun ended, and I headed to a plush hotel near Okayama station for Shonan koko's Bonenkai ("celebrate ending of year by drinking lots" party). Enkai's, as I have previously touched upon in this blog, are many things, but one thing that matters above all others is the presence and consumption of vast quantities of alcohol. After the kanpai was said (kanpai's being far more symbolic and honorific than "cheers" in the West), everyone got drunk very quickly. There were speeches (including my own, in Japanese...get me!), and a raffle, in which I won a ceramic pig, woohoo! Takemoto-sensei won a Nintendo Shiny Handheld Games Thingy. Food (excellant rare beef, sashimi, spaghetti, and many other things) was accompanied by biru (beer) and sake, and after the enkai ended me and some other sensei launched off to what has to be the plushest bar in Okayama. What a treat! Dom Perignon was consumed, and we were close to ordering the fine and expensive Johnny Walker Blue. Our drinking was limited in the end to Guinness, Gin and Tonic, Beer, Wine and finished off by three kinds of Absinthe, accompanied by chicken delicacies and five kinds of fine European cheese.

Drunk and tired, we stumbled onto the train home to Kojima. The proudest moment of the night was holding several conversations almost entirely in Japanese, and feeling I finally almost deserve the praise Nihonjin sensei usually heap upon us gaijin and our efforts to learn the language. Enkai's are funny things, but its a great chance to chat with teachers, and (as expected) many who don't normally speak with me came up to me and talked "enthusiastically". One of the things I really like is the tradition of never filling your own drink. Instead, you always fill those around you, which results in everyone helping to get everyone else more and more drunk. I was told a lot of suprising and interesting stuff that night, which I dare not repeat!

Today has been mostly pain. I went to my friend Meghan's choir concert in Kurashiki which was nice; a selection of songs including Mozart and a Christmas medley! It made me very festive, and I walked back through Kurashiki's Bikan historical area feeling cheery. Then I went to Jupiter in Okayama Station, a foreign food shop, and bought brie, cheddar and lindt (so much for saving money, again).

More Photos of Me and Orphans Will Follow Soon.

Ni Ju San Sai (23)- Please Send Gifts and Charitable Donations To: Sunlife Uchida #102, Kojima Shimono-chou 5-8-10, Kurashiki-shi, Okayama-ken, Japan

Well, the grand old age of 23, eh?

Seems a long time since I was passed out in Nottingham parks surrounded by bottles of cheap wine, a long time since me and Greasy Steve lit up the streets of the City of Gun Crime, a long time since Simon Elliott lived in a climate of fear thanks to me and Dan.

Time passes though, and now I am older and wiser (like anyone believes that eh). Yesterday was my birthday, in case no-one noticed, and while I am not really a bday person (prefering to get very drunk in a corner), I do like attention lavished upon me. It was thus my lucky day- I got several presents from teachers, furry stickers and other joyous gifts from my friends, a surprise cake in a restaurant (que my one word speech of "sugoy!"), not to mention inappropriate whiteboard messages from some of my students.

The only black mark on an otherwise nice day was being beaten 3-2, in the last minute of time, by an own goal, by Philip Jones (aka "Pip"), the Welsh bloke. To elaborate, this was on the greatest video game ever invented, a combination of a regular football game with half a rubber football at your feet to whack whenever you want to pass the ball/shoot. I was 2-0 up, and collapsed in a way that only England can (the Ashes, anyone?).

Anyway, that aside, my birthday was lovely.

Murakami and His Wonderful Books

Being in a literary mood, I thought I'd discuss Haruki Murakami's wonderful books. I've read six of them now, and am soon to read two more; Wild Sheep Chase and Sputnik Sweetheart. I've tended to avoid getting caught up in any single author before, but I've slowly slid into the Murakami trap. Not that it's that bad a trap to be in. My favourite Murakami books, in order (yes I know everone loves writing lists in order, but no-one likes reading them, but this is my blog so there) are...

1. Norweigan Wood
2. Hard Boiled Wonderland and the End of the World
3. Kafka on the Shore
4. Underground
5. Wind-Up Bird Chronicle
6. Blind Willow, Sleeping Woman

All six are excellant books, there has not been a single disappointment. The only book that comes close in Blind Willow, but purely because I've never been a fan of short stories. Once I get sucked into a book I want to be able to stay there for a while, whereas short stories seem to drag you out just as things are getting good.

I finished Hard Boiled Wonderland yesterday. It's one of Murakami's most surreal, with its (and his) highly publicised Kafka-esque passages, as well as bizarre leanings towards science fiction. Yet its his writing style, his effortless descriptions of every detail of regular life, and his exploration of human relationships, that once again makes it so gripping. You really get inside the heads (quite literally in this book) of Murakami's central characters, and he manages to recreate the reality of relationships and life, particular within urban environments. It's when he focuses on this most fully- and cuts out the surrealism that many find attractive- in Norweigan Wood, that I enjoy his writing the most. Wind-Up Bird is his most discussed book, and the harrowing wartime Manchuria scene in the middle of the book (as well as the host of metaphors that any high school English literature teacher would go nuts over) certainly make it stand out. Yet the narrative itself is stronger in H-B-Wonderland, in Kafka on the Shore, and certainly in Norweigan Wood.

Ultimately its very easy to identify with the characters Murakami creates in his books. You sympathise and understand these imperfect individuals, often thrown into extraordinary situations. Hard Boiled Wonderland has one of those endings where you stop and think for some time afterwards. It's either profound or ridiculous, and I haven't quite worked out which yet.

In other exciting news the staff at my local supermarket, Nishina Food Basket, are now all wearing Santa hats! Cheery people in Santa hats are no big deal. And grumpy people without hats are just depressing. But there's something highly amusing about grumpy people in Santa hats.

Finally, today I prepared a lesson plan entitled Birmingham: City of Dreams. I hope to make it available for download on this blog soon enough, but for now, here's a preview from the introduction...

"Birmingham is the second largest city in Britain.It has the biggest shopping mall in Europe, called the Bull Ring. It also has an excellant football team called Birmingham City Football Club. It has many good restaurant that serve curry. A special curry from Birmingham is called a balti. Birmingham is a special place. The people there are very friendly. It is full of opportunities. It is a City of Dreams!"

I hope to do a follow-up, entitled "Nottingham : City of Gun Crime" soon.

Brrrrrrrrrr

My cold/flu still present, I hurried to school this morning in an effort to avoid being late once again. Whenever I don't teach first thing I have serious trouble arriving at school on time, and in Japan being 5 minutes late for work is a serious crime, often punished by incarceration in a Japanese jail for 21 days (a punishment also awarded for cycling while tipsy). Plus, as a gaijin, there's the perennial fear of deportation. Anyway, I failed. 10 minutes late, another time-keeping blot on my otherwise exemplary record (tho I avoided both the deportation AND the jailtime)

In my defence my speedy cycling efforts weren't helped by the ice cold winds that have picked up around Kojima over the last few days. As one teacher hilarious declared in his most sinister voice this morning, "Winter Is Coming!" It certainly is, and it seems inconceivable that temperatures will drop further in the coming two months. At least I'll be transported to a tropical climate for 3 weeks soon enough.

Today was the Interview Test, which was cause for much joy on my part. Marching into the "Communications Room" (a gadgeted-up classroom that resembles some sort of Command Centre) I greeted the nervy, fidgeted students who were today's lucky victims. The students could be broadly divided into three categories,

1) Those who knew they weren't gonna do well and didn't care (The Cocky Ones)
2) Those who were quiet in class but knew the stuff (The Conscientious Ones)
3) Those who were both quiet AND didn't do well (err, The "At Least You Tried" Ones)

It's amazing what you can tell about someone as soon as they enter the room; which students were quietly confident, and which were staring disaster straight in the face. I'm pleased to say I was fair and balanced throughout, tho a bit disappointed one of my favourites didn't do that well (to her credit she did sheepishly say "sorry" at the end of the interview). Anyway, this week I have another 50 or so students to grade, so we'll see how long my enthusiasm for Interview Tests lasts.

In other news, I'm down to my last few pennies in the bank after paying for all the Korea and Philipinnes things. This means that I have to put my current spending plans; raw horsemeat sashimi (expensive stuff), Christmas Port (I miss port!!), a £500 SLR camera and several expensive items of clothing, aside. I also have to curb my sashimi cravings, survive without a new heater, and drink less beer for another week and a half (god, no!). Next weekend I have free entertainment however; orphans during Saturday afternoon (more on which later in the week), and Shonan Christmas Enkai in the evening, then a Christmas concert on Sunday.

Still, my cold still rages inside whilst sitting in my apartment is like sitting in a fridge. Brrrrrr.

Referee, Ur Havin' A Laugh

First the great news; last night the Blues won 3-0 to move to top of the league!! Back of the net!! Promotion in our sights...

Next the terrible news; after being 1st for a significant proportion of the season, Vissel had slipped to 2nd with one game to play. Yesterday they lost 2-1 whilst Reysol won comfortably, meaning they finish 3rd, and go into a two leg play-off against Fukuoka, to be played over the next week. If we lose then its J2 for another season.

In between was the Japanese Language Proficiency Test today. It's hard to tell how it went, though it was fairly similar to the practice papers, most of which I've passed. Despite having serious pains and aches, I woke up at 7am and made it across the Inland Sea for the test. I'd say I'm 70% confident I passed, but will have to wait till February to find out. On the way back I had Mr.Donut and coffee mmmm! Made me feel better. And on the train me Carrie and Phil attracted the attention of a group of old dearies, one of whom rounded on me and proceeded to, as we were crossing the bridge, explain the names for various islands that she'd made up. I got off at Kojima, and was greeted by a chorus of "sayonara"s and "bye bye"s for the old deary brigade in our carriage.

The test was "policed" by three Japanese girls, who had a yellow and red card system with which to punish offenders. Speaking was a yellow card offence, as was harassing locals, whereas copying was a straight red. Whether or not a second yellow would have been shown before the red (as is correct) in the case of a two yellows sending off is unclear, as the girls didnt punish anyone (despite some muppets opening the paper before the exam started). They wouldn't have made good refs. Even when demonstrating the use of the cards, they didn't brandish them but rather held them like someone holds a teabag they've just taken out of a cup of tea. There was no card for dissent either (though I doubt anyone would have shouted "Ref, You're Having A F*cking Laugh" at any of the ladies). Anyway, they were very lovely, so I can't complain.